When I graduated with my undergraduate degree in biology, I felt both intense pride and fear at the same time. I think a lot of graduates would agree, as this is the time when adulthood comes knocking like “ready or not, here I come.” I had made the confident decision to take a year off between degrees. Between everything I had gone through and a lack of clear direction, it was honestly the best decision I made for my education. Besides, science is hard and I did not want to feel burnt out by rushing to the next thing.
I had a summer internship experience set up in Pittsburgh where I would be doing research in hopes of pursuing my dream of going to medical school. I had always known that research wasn’t for me and that summer really solidified that for me, which meant my plans were about to swiftly change.
One of the doctors in my lab looked me directly in the eye and told me “don’t go to medical school unless you f*cking hate yourself.” Don’t get me wrong, I believe doctors have a great role and responsibility and I know I could have done it, but nearly every person I encountered seemed so miserable and I just felt it in my heart that it wasn’t the path for me anymore.
Initially, it took me a while to let that dream go. I think it’s tough because we live in a culture where there is so much pressure to achieve greatness and not let people down. We think it’s not okay to change our minds. Truth is, you are allowed to change your mind. At the end of the day, you have to do what is best for you and if it means changing career paths, then so be it. Chances are God had that plan for you all along, so you might as well lean into it by letting Him lead you.
This was also the year I fell in love with exercise. I knew that I loved science, and lifting is both an art and a science, so I decided to take the leap and study for my personal training certification. I figured if I could do that, then maybe graduate school for exercise science would be the next step. In fact, I knew it was the right step because of how much peace it gave me.
I can still vividly remember the day that I wrote my personal statement. I sat in my local hometown coffee shop, Beans on Broad, doing research and preparing my application. I had written so many personal statements up to this point, and if you have written one, you might know they are not the most fun task to do. This time, however, it was the most freeing and easiest experience. The words just flowed and I had so much clarity. I just knew that I was going to this school and that I would be moving to Charlotte to basically start my life!
Sure enough, three years later, I am now graduated with my Master’s degree in Kinesiology, also known as human movement science. When I started my program, I had a slight idea that I wanted to start my own business, but not really any clear direction for what it would entail. My program was in clinical exercise physiology, so I was exposed to three different internships that really helped develop me in more ways than I could imagine. Honestly, the entire graduate school experience is enough to rock your world. I made next to nothing in terms of money so I was constantly financially paranoid, I was juggling three jobs on top of being a full time student, and I experienced a phase of loneliness unlike anything I had ever encountered.
In the two years I spent pursuing that degree, God spoke to me more than I think I have ever realized before in my life. I can honestly say that moving to Charlotte was the best thing I have ever done for myself. Through the loneliness, I was able to draw closer to the Lord, and that has been the constant in my life since living here.
Because of my flourishing relationship with God, He slowly revealed to me the path that all my experiences were preparing me for. All of my past trauma and education have purpose. The purpose that I am pursuing is that of a health coach whose mission is to help women invite Jesus into their health journey through restoring their relationship with themselves, fitness and food so that they can live in abundance.
The name for my business took me a long time to find. It actually held me back for a little while because I was so hung up on it. Funny enough, one day after a run (I know, I don’t run but that day I did lol), the name hit me. Here is the exact text I sent my dear friend, Cole, who has been my graphic design genius and treasured confidant:
“I need you to know that I just ran a mile. Outside. Haven’t run like that in so long. Now as I am continuing to walk I am doing some thinking. I still have a lot of writing to do, but here’s what keeps standing out to me:
Surrender Wellness and Company.
What do you need to surrender today? When we surrender, we take steps towards achieving wellness through the mind, soul and body. At surrender and co we strive to achieve wellness through renewing your mind, transforming your soul and breaking through stories that we tell ourselves about what our body can and cannot do. Step into your power through Christ. Surrender. Wellness is waiting.”
I will have more on the meaning behind the name and how I know God called me to it in the coming weeks, but what I want you to know is this: women deserve to love themselves well. I believe that everything changed for me when I invited Jesus into my health journey. The love of our God prevails and it is the most precious and life giving kind of love. When you fix your focus on that, all the other pieces of the puzzle come together.
When you place your trust in the Lord for your health, you are unstoppable. Your physical, mental and emotional health will be unstable if your spiritual health is not firmly grounded. God cares for your health. He cares for you. Health and wellness is a journey, and there is healing and restoration in the process. You won’t always be ashamed of your body, you won’t always be at war with yourself, you won’t always be anxious about food at the holidays or when going out to eat. Jesus cares about all of that, so if you are struggling, invite Him in. Let Him lead you.
Wellness is waiting.